Oh, yes. I’ve surrendered before, to be sure. Many times. I even thought I surrendered unconditionally! What a deception!

“But Lord, what if…”  I’ve said this so many times.

Last year God showed me I wasn’t surrendered. Oh yes, I admitted it. But I was stubborn. I didn’t really care. I was in the midst of the most exhausting and taxing assignment of my life… so perhaps it’s understandable… but certainly not excusable.

This year God has been still teaching me to surrender, unconditionally… holding nothing back. Bit by bit, lesson by lesson, I’ve given Him more and more. Even if it hurts, I know He has my best interest in mind. Little by little, I’ve given more and more of myself into His hands.

Has He ever tested you? He tested me this week… I wrestled with the choice. I knew He was asking me to do it, but it just didn’t make sense. It was a contradiction. Abraham was tested too. I’m sure it didn’t make sense to him either!

I chose… To follow Him whatever the cost. I gave this area of my life completely to Him. I laid it all in His hands. What peace filled me! Hours later He showed me it was a test… Now it all made sense! Now I saw the whole picture and how he was leading me. He had confirmed my trust in Him.

But what if I hadn’t surrendered? What if I refused to give my all? Perhaps I would never have seen the picture as I see it now.

What about you? He doesn’t require it all at once. Its a process. But will you surrender your most cherished fragments of life when He asks for them? You know you want them, but He’s asking for them! Will you give Him your most precious possessions? Your plans? Your talents? Your time? Your energy? The most secret parts of your life?  Your hearts inner desires and longings?

He’s still waiting, even now.